There is this joke about a preacher who was giving a sermon on forgiving your enemies.
It was a hot summer day and his message was unusually long. For the congregants it felt like the end of the message was never going to come, but eventually, after more than two hours of preaching, it finally reached a conclusion, or so they thought.
In closing the pastor asked them to raise their hands if they had forgiven their enemies. A few hands gingerly went up.
Sensing the congregation did not fully grasp the importance of his message, the preacher proceeded to lecture them for another 15 minutes, at the end of which he asked the question again. This time more hands went up, but there were still a lot of people not reaching for the sky.
The preacher then took another 30 minutes to explain how vital forgiveness is and made a point to make eye contact with every member of the congregation to stress the importance of the message.
It dawned on the people that there was a very good chance that they were not going to be allowed to leave before everyone put their hands up. So when the pastor asked the question again, everyone responded, except one.
Mrs Jones, a 93 year old widow, who happened to be the oldest member of the congregation, sat with her hands folded on her lap looking straight at him.
Curiosity finally getting the better of him, the pastor enquired; Mrs Jones, dont you have any enemies to forgive? Mrs Jones intently looked at him and then replied innocently, Well Pastor, I dont have any enemies.
Elated with the response the preacher motioned to her to come to the pulpit to share her keen insights into forgiveness. As the old woman reached the pulpit the preacher piped up, So Mrs Jones, how is it that you dont have any enemies to forgive.? To which she promptly replied, Well its easy. I outlived them all.
Must we forgive?
Maybe like Mrs Jones, there is someone in your life who has done you a terrible wrong and you just cant get it past yourself to forgive them. Maybe like her, youre just waiting for the day they die so that you can finally win.
The question though, is what does the Bible say about forgiveness? How does God view the matter?
In Mathew 6:9-15 we find the Lords Prayer. Here Jesus gives us an example of how we should pray. In verses 12-15 we read And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. For if you forgive others when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Later in the book of Mathew, Chapter 18:21-22, the Apostle Peter comes to Jesus and asks, Lord, how many times shall I forgive someone who sins against me? Up to seven times? Jesus answered, I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
In the same chapter Jesus tells a parable about a man who owes a king 10 000 bags of gold. He is unable to pay and begs the king for mercy. The king forgives his debt and the man gains his freedom. Then the man does a strange thing. He finds a fellow servant who owes a hundred silver coins and has him thrown into jail until he should pay his debt.
The king finds out about this and loses his temper. He has the man who initially owed him 10 000 bags of gold thrown in jail and tortured [NKJ] until all his debts were paid. The story ends like this (Mathew 18:35) This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive a brother or sister from your heart.
Clearly from these examples we see that God views forgiveness in a very serious light. So clearly we must forgive our fellow man.
Why must we forgive?
One could argue that we have to forgive just because God says so, but that would be missing the point. Forgiveness is not some arbitrary thing that God wants from us to be in his good books. It is not an entry fee that we pay to get to heaven. You see, the purpose of Jesus sacrifice was not just to pardon us from sin.
Its primary purpose was so that we can experience a relationship with God and become part of his family. Forgiveness is a means to an end because through Jesus sacrifice we are made righteous and blameless before God. This all happened because God loves us and he wants us to experience his love. But you cannot experience that love if your heart is filled with hatred.
In Galatians 5:19-21 we read: The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Forgiveness is therefore more than merely an ideal Christian virtue but rather penetrates to the very heart of life. When we forgive each other we mirror and take part in the divine character of God. In other words we become more like God. We have to forgive because if we dont, we carry hate in our heart, which is contrary to the law of love.
Forgiveness is not a requirement of salvation
In the same way that good works are not a requirement for salvation, forgiveness is also not a requirement for salvation. If you accept Christ and confess him as your Saviour the result should be that you want to do what he tells you to do. You are compelled by love for him. So for the born again Christian who believes, forgiveness should be a natural progression from accepting Christ as your Saviour. As someone develops a more intimate relationship with Jesus they will want to become more like him.
Matthew is therefore only a condemnation to those who dont trust Christ. Jesus died for our sins thousands of years before we lived. The forgiveness of sin is therefore assured. Our salvation does not depend on our performance, but on the righteousness of Christ.
As someone becomes more mature in his Christian faith they will have to come face to face with reality that God and hate are incompatible. Somewhere along the line you will have to choose between holding on to the hate or Jesus. Just remember you cant have both.
Forgiveness is not based on a transaction
God has already forgiven your sins prior to your ever committing them. And it was never dependant on the quality or quantity of your forgiveness. People who view it like a transaction think they have to earn Gods respect through obedience and good works. They look down on people who arent trying as hard as they are.
The minimum requirement to forgive is a willingness to want to let go
It is our heartfelt willingness to forgive that God desires. Like our faith, our ability to forgive completely, is woefully inadequate. But when we surrender it to God, he makes it complete.
Jesus instructs us to forgive but does not instruct us to forget
God says that only he blots out our sins. It is natural to remember and be cautious. Dont suffer fools and people who try to take you for a ride, but dont harbour grudges, hatred, and condemnation and seek vengeance. Vengeance is mine says the Lord. (Romans 12:19).
There is a difference between justice and forgiveness
Just because someone is forgiven does not mean they will not suffer the consequences of their action. A drunk driver who kills a child, may be forgiven by the childs parents, but that does not mean that he does not go to jail for his crime.
Forgiveness is a process
So what about the individual who was abused as a child for many years? Once he or she decides to forgive does it mean that all the emotional pain and scars just vanish? No it certainly does not!
The reality is that forgiveness is a process that starts with the willingness to forgive. It takes time to work through all the pain and emotional trauma, but remember you dont face it alone. With Gods help you are transformed from the inside out. That means that over time, God will not only heal your emotional scars, but will enable you to forgive completely.
Conclusion
Forgiveness is an essential part of being a Christian. Although it is not a requirement for salvation, not forgiving will have dire consequences when it comes to your relationship with God. You cannot say that you love God and hate your neighbour and still expect to remain in Christ.
Hate is a cancer that will not only poison your walk with God, but will end up destroying relationships with others along the way as well. But we dont have to face the problem alone.
Like everything else in our Christian faith, our human effort does not get us anywhere. Christ not only makes us righteous before God, not only bolsters our faith, helps us with our problems and takes care of our daily needs, but even helps us to forgive so that we can experience the joy of having an intimate relationship with the Triune God.
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