Children nowadays have not a scrap of manners. That is a line from the book Comfort herself by Geraldine Kaye.1 It seems to me that it is not only children who lack manners these days.
I was at a funeral a few years ago and we were standing at the graveside. I saw three high school teachers on the other side of the grave where they stood behind other people, laughing and joking. I could not believe what I was seeing! Here was a solemn burial service in progress while some people were having their own private little social gathering. Perhaps the deceased was not their relative or friend. Perhaps they were not feeling the pain that some of us were feeling, but why not show respect? I mean, respect for the deceased, the graveyard, the burial that was taking place, or respect the fact that the deceased was a king. It was a privilege for us to bury him because in Venda tradition, kings and all royal people are buried in their own graveyard by royal people only.
Proverbs 1:8-9 tells us, Listen, my son, to your fathers instruction and do not forsake your mothers teaching. They will be a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.
Lack of manners and disrespecting elders seems to be acceptable by society these days. When I was studying in Durban I was sometimes pleasantly surprised by how some young people respected their elders. They would stand up in the bus or train and offer them their seats. In other places young people would just say, we all paid the same price, so why should I stand? Or, I got in first, so next time they (the older people) will learn to get in quickly. But the bible teaches us something entirely different. In the same way be submissive to those who are older. Clothe yourselves with humility towards one another because God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (1 Peter 5: 5).
Back chat, name calling
So many young people treat their parents or other elders like idiots because they do not know the new technology or they are illiterate or they did not go to university. They back chat and call parents names, and if the parent tries to discipline them they threaten to have them arrested. I cannot imagine going to the police station to open a case against my own parents!
A friend told me of someone who had his dad arrested for assault. This young man in his mid twenties had an argument with his father, who lost his temper and slapped him across the face. No doubt this father was in a highly emotional state due to his sons behaviour. But the young man went to the nearest police station and opened a case against his own father. The police came and arrested the poor old man. Since this young man started working he disrespects his father because he can no longer work due to old age. He seems to have forgotten that the old man cared for him from the time he was a baby, when he could not do anything for himself. His father made sacrifices to pay for his university education. Now that he is a respected professional at his work, he thinks even at home he is now above his parents. He is currently the only breadwinner in the house.
But all of us, young and old, should realize that as time goes by, we too will probably fall behind in the technological race. We may find it difficult to learn new things, and certainly our physical abilities will diminish with time. How would we like to be treated by the younger generation?
Seeing these horrible examples of young people behaving badly, I cant help wondering if this is just the tip of the iceberg. Where are our traditions of respect and honour? What kind of a society will we have 10 years from now 20 years from now?
Thankfully, God will not allow this to go on forever. When Jesus returns in glory to rule the world, he will restore all things, including the custom of respect for parents and elders.
for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the Lord as the waters cover the sea (Isaiah 11:9)
1 Comfort herself by Geraldine Kaye (Methuen Publishing Ltd) 1986.