It was 1970 and I was undergoing my military training in Pretoria. After three months of basic training we were allowed to go home every second weekend.
Home for me was 600 kilometres away in Durban. I remember so clearly standing on the side of the busy road on Friday afternoons with ND (the car registration letters indicating Durban) painted on my suitcase, desperately waiting, and hoping for a kind person to give me a lift. On rare occasions I received a lift directly to Durban but often I would be dropped off in the middle of nowhere and left standing alone for hours in the freezing darkness. Sometimes, because it was so dark that motorists couldnt see me, I resorted to sleeping in mealie fields until daylight. On one occasion I only arrived in Durban on Saturday evening. A journey that should have taken less than 8 hours actually took a night and a day! By Sunday lunch-time I was back on the road again for the long return trip. Two weeks later I would endure the same ordeal again.
Sounds silly doesnt it? Why didnt I just settle for a stress-free weekend and remain in the camp? I could have slept in late, relaxed and spent time with friends.
Well you see, it all had to do with my heart.
My heart was not in a military camp in Pretoria. It was 600 kilometres away and nothing would stop me from getting on that road again!
It was all because of a very special lady by the name of Marilys my future wife. And so with her picture in my wallet, a pocketful of dreams and a heart full of love I prevailed, persisted and pursued her along those highways and byways again and again. I was determined to conquer every obstacle in my way, to spend time with her and capture her heart and to ensure no one else would.
As I recently reflected back on those days, I caught a glimpse of what God is like and definitely not like. Many think God is far off and not too concerned about their daily living. Some describe God as angry or just a spiritual power. Others feel that everything depends on us. If we go to him in prayer he may or may not answer, but if we just do our own thing he will sit passively and watch.
He is just the opposite. He is not an angry God. He is not a passive God. He is a God who initiates in love a furious love. He is a God who is far more active in our lives than we realise.
God is proactive
Think of the first four words in the Bible: In the beginning God Immediately they provide us with the key, which begins to open our understanding of who God is and what he is like. These words reveal that God is proactive. He is always there in the beginning before anyone or anything else. I John 4:19 teaches us that God loved us first and it is because he took action that we can now love. He didnt wait for us to be faithful, obedient, good enough, holy or blameless. Nor did he wait for us to decide. It was first his decision. Furthermore, you dont have to try and win his love. You already have it.
God loved us first and it is because he took action that we can now love.
Psalm 23 is a well-known and much loved Psalm. Most people are familiar with the ending: Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. But there is something in these words that is easily missed. The word follow doesnt quite capture the Hebrew word radaph. It should be rendered more forcefully. It is more like to pursue, harass, chase after, to hunt1. It is the same word used to describe the Egyptians in their aggressive effort to stop the fleeing Israelites in Exodus 14:8-9. It can also be used to describe an animal in pursuit. C.S. Lewis once said that he could not give advice on pursuing God, but, he wrote: It was the other way round; God was the hunter (or so it seemed to me) and I was the deer.2 This word follow is not a picture of God trailing along behind us like a faithful dog but it is a breathtaking image of Gods immeasurable love and unbending commitment towards us. The Message Bible translates verse 6; your beauty and love chase after me every day of my life.
God is the initiator
This is what God is really like. He is the divine Lover, who desires to have and to hold us, who wants to breathe into us his life, and to embrace us in his love. 3 He is so passionate for us that he wants us to experience all he is and has to give. He pursues us to share his awesome love with us! He is active in his faithful pursuing of you and me even when we are unfaithful in pursuing him! We see this in the much loved parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32). However, the parable is not really about the son but it is the passion of the father that drives it. He saw his son coming down the road and with his heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him (Luke 15:20; The Message Bible). The wayward son had done nothing to earn this gracious response from his father. In fact, the father didnt even wait to listen to his excuses but called for a party to celebrate the finding of his lost son. What a beautiful and stirring picture of what our Father God is really like!
Are you beginning to see what all of this means?
We can never say: I was searching for God and then I found him. No. Before we began searching for God he was chasing after us. He was the initiator. Although we may think that the Christian life is all about what we do, it is not. Yes, we have many things to do but it is first of all about God and his great plan (Ephesians 1:4-5). It originated in him. He is more involved in our salvation than we are ourselves.
But most of all this reveals Gods heart. He loves you with a reckless, unquenchable love. He never gives up, never stops loving, never stops dreaming. He pursues. He persists. Like me, a young soldier, hitchhiking across the country to spend a few hours with the one I loved.
And if he had a wallet your picture would be in it.
1 Strongs Concordance and biblos.com
2 Christian Reflections: CS Lewis
3 Invitation to Theology: Michael Jinkins
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