Many years ago my late wife, Trixie, and I were having a conversation about unfaithfulness and extra-marital affairs.
One of her remarks boiled down to a threat that she would inflict some heavy physical damage on any woman who comes between us. I am happy to say that she never had cause to carry out that threat.
But was this jealousy?
Many a romantic movie or love story has jealousy as the pivotal emotion. Those of us who love Latin American music and dancing will remember the tango entitled Jealousy, and then theres the country song about a jealous suitor who murdered his unfaithful lover On the banks of the Ohio.
Even in this era of moral decay, a love triangle still makes a popular movie that may develop various outcomes – even murder. Jealousy is often at the heart of a bad end result.
But Is jealousy necessarily evil?
If it is, then what does one make of Exodus 20:5 where God says that he is a jealous God or where he goes as far as to say that he is a consuming fire (Deuteronomy 4:24)?
The punishments he threatened to inflict on the children of Israel, should any one of them have an affair, spiritually speaking with other religions, makes Trixies threat look like childs play.
How would you feel if you heard or read that the Lord your God is a jealous God? Would you feel threatened or flattered?
Sometimes, in love stories, there could be a situation where the spouse, or boy or girlfriend would be tied up in a situation where he or she could not contact the other party to explain why they were late. The conversation could go something like this:
Are you jealous?
No.
I think you are.
No, Im not.
Oh yes, you are.
Well, maybe a little, but you should have sent some message.
This kind of jealousy could be flattering, but any possibility of a third party entering a relationship would send out major distress signals. There is both a positive and negative aspect to jealousy. Besides the obvious negative side something similar to envy the word jealousy can convey an intense love, a passionate desire and an intense level of commitment for something which is rightly our own.
The Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 7:3 that the husband and the wife should render the affection to each other which is due to them. Verse 4 says that the husbands body belongs to his wife and the wifes body belongs to her husband. In fact, the New King James version says that the wife and the husband do not even have authority over their own bodies. Its a matter of possession. And God doubly possesses the born again Christian.
A terrible loss
There is a story of a little boy who made himself a beautiful model of a sailing ship from a kit. It was something magnificent like the Kitty Hawk. With excitement he took it down to the waterside and carefully set it to sail. As he proudly watched the miniature gracefulness of it bobbing in the ripples, a sudden gust of wind took it out into the deep and out of his reach.
For some time he grieved over his terrible loss. But as life went on he almost forgot about his little ship. But one day he passed the local pawn shop, or Cash Convertor, and saw in his peripheral vision something that stirred his heart!
Neatly displayed, almost as if in a place of honour in the shop window, was his Kitty Hawk! Excited, he went into the shop.
Sir that little ship in the window is mine.
How can you say that, sonny?
I built it. I made it.
But now it is in my shop!
Yes, but I lost it at the riverside when the wind took it away! The boy responded tearfully.
Oh, but I bought it and paid good money for it. If you want it back you will have to buy it. Now run along and only come back if you have the right amount to pay.
His grief was doubled, but so was his determination. He ran all the way home, rushed into his bedroom, grabbed his piggy bank and broke it on the floor. He counted his savings and found that if he wanted his ship back it would take every penny he had.
A joyful reunion
He ran right back to the shop and, out of breath, placed the due amount on the counter.
With a business-like air the shop owner counted every last penny.
Fine, you have just enough here. You may take the ship out of the window, because if you drop it now, it will be your loss.
Happily he left the shop caressing the little sailing ship to his breast. Tears of joy welled up as he talked to his little ship.
Little ship, I made you. You were mine. But then I lost you. A bad wind changed and took you away. Someone who did not like you found you and sold you just like they sold Joseph in Egypt, to a bad man who thought he owned you, because he bought you.
Then I took everything I had and paid the price the shopkeeper demanded for you.
With eyes sparkling and gently stroking the little sails he said.
Little ship, now you are twice as much mine!
In his immense love God created humanity and proclaimed us as very good. He owned us firstly. But then the ill winds of evil blew us into the grip of the adversary who would not let go of us. But God so loved the world that he sent Jesus his very own Son -to pay the ultimate price demanded.
We are twice as much His. Dont you think he is entitled to a little jealousy?
In his letter to the Corinthians, Paul says he is jealous for them with a godly jealousy. And why? I promised you to one husband, to Christ But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpents cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ (2 Corinthians 11: 2-3).
Yes, our God is a jealous God. He paid for us with his own blood. He doesnt want us to drift away into dangerous uncharted waters where we may not be able to find our way back into the safe harbour of his love.